Don’t baby them

Whoever thought of 2 weeks out of school must not have been a parent

Now please believe me when I say I love spending time with all of my kids but it seriously is hard when you have 2 autistic children and you have to turn their weekend routine into a 2 week routine like the weekends. Now im not saying I want to pawn my kids off on the local school but when you have autistic children they thrive on routine and I have never ever been good at having a routine or good organization skills. I have always been a spur of the moment type of person. My autistic children arent as sensitive when it comes to routine because I never really had one. Then I got to thinking why alot of kids have a ton of meltdowns when their routine changes. I look at the type of family they are such as organized,first time parents,stressed parents, and then those parents who allow autism to overrule their home, life and child.

Believe it or not I have seen parents that baby every single behavior even if its good or bad. During meltdowns they will have every single remedy available like chew toys,swings,trampolines,deep pressure,etc.. and then there are the parents like me. We dont have alot of money so I cant afford alot of the stuff that these people use and so my son has basically had to learn to deal with it and cry it out or sit and scream for hours on end until he forgets what was bothering him.

Now Ill admit when this first started we had some crazy days where a half a day had went by and he was still pretty upset but as time went on it got easier. He got used to how things are and that you cant always get what you want, he got used to more sounds,lights, and things that used to bother him dont bother him as much or at all. So i want to tell you new parents to this..

There is a light at the end of the tunnel

But the key is to let them get used to it. I hear parents say “well we had to order special shoes” or “We have to keep the lights and music down at our house all the time and keep our other kids in another room to play” The fact is that you are babying their autism. Your letting it overrule your home and instead of your child having autism, autism has your child (and your entire household). So the best thing to do is make them get used to it. Sure its gonna be hard. Life is hard and even us as nonautistics have to get used to things in life without special accomodation. I understand that there are children with other special needs besides autism and thats not what this conversation is about. This is about your classic case of autism.

If you normally clean the house with music up full blast and dance around then keep doing it.

Your child will cover their ears, or go into another room but eventually they will be dancing around in the kitchen with you like mine do. If you have other children that play and run,laugh and jump around then encourage them to try and get your autistic child to join. If at first they dont and pull away thats fine. Eventually your child will be playing with them. I know these things because I have watched 2 of my children who couldnt stand lights, sounds, social activity and now they are social butterflies after just a few short years.

Too much t.v. is not bad for autistic children.

In fact autistic children learn and thrive from repetative behaviors just like toddlers. It does matter what your putting in front of your child. With my son he loved Busy Beavers on Youtube. So heres a link if you wanna watch these cool little critters..

My son would watch this show from morning until night and went from a nonverbal child sitting in the corners to singing his ABC’s,Colors,shapes,numbers and all the other cool stuff you can see on here. They teach kids with music and as we all know autistic kids love anything to do with music. Another good thing is social stories. If you have an autistic child or even a non autistic child that has behavioral issues like not keeping their hands to themselves or not wanting to wait in a line. Then there are a ton of social stories that you can find on youtube as well to help. You can also find some that have music with them. Here is one of our favorites. The wondergrove kids.

You can click on the photos above to take you to their Youtube channels or you can search in the search box on the top of the page.

 

I really hope I am not offending anyone by this blog post but I thought it was necessary to get this information out there because it is important to know what is healthy and what is not. Dont allow autism to run your life and your childs life. If you dont have any other children except your autistic child it may be an issue because you dont know any other way.

Those of you with other children use the same things you do with those children with your autistic child or children. If you only have an autistic child reach out to other parents. There are many social media networks that have autism support groups. M.A.T. is one of those awesome sites. You can reach their site at www.MyAutismteam.com. There you can find out about different therapies, meet different parents, learn about alternative medicine and diet (if your into that kind of stuff). It is an awesome site and you can learn alot from others. I hope this blog post helps in some way. And if it offended anyone Im sorry, but someone had to bring up the subject..lol.. Good luck everyone with the rest of this Christmas break.

~Christina

 

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